Argh.
Absolutely bombed one of my final papers. Of course, it had to be the one for the professor I desperately need to impress. I wanted to ask him to be my dissertation sponsor. However, he now probably thinks I'm a stumbling moron.
Maybe it's a sign.
Maybe I should put off my Qualifying Paper (the first three chapters of your dissertation that you defend to a panel of tenured faculty to advance to candidacy) until after the MBA. (By which time in all likelihood I'll want to be out of school and take a job somewhere in corporate America, and finish my doctorate somewhere else - Harvard or Stanford maybe - I like red.)
It sure fits with the other element - turns out that the grant that I was after is not being appropriated this fiscal year. The organizations are still interested, which is good, but the funding is missing. Key component.
Maybe it's a way of the cosmos telling me I shouldn't be tied into anything long term right now. Between the grant and the dissertation, it would be at least a four year project. Hmm, who's to say that I'll even want to focus on the same subject by the time I get done at the Business School. Or for that matter, that I'll even make it through the B-school.
Both things devastated me at first, but now I think it's probably for the best. I'll work harder this way and there will be a bit less pressure.
Posted by Amanda at January 20, 2003 10:16 PM
